• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

The Professor Is In

Guidance for all things PhD: Graduate School, Job Market and Careers

  • Home
    • Testimonials
    • Intervention Testimonials
    • Gift Certificates
  • Academic Job Help
    • Services Overview
    • Job Document Editing
    • The Art of the Academic Cover Letter
    • The Art of the Academic CV
    • Quick Job Document Editing
    • Interviews, Job Talks, Teaching Demos and Campus Visits
    • Personal Negotiating Assistance
    • Tenure and Promotion Statement Assistance
    • Article/Chapter Manuscript Editing
    • Current Specials
  • Institutions
  • Career Coaching
    • One-on-One Career Consults
    • Tenure Denial Consultations
    • CV Strategizing Service
    • Pre-Tenure Coaching Group
    • Graduate School Application Assistance
  • Productivity
    • Unstuck: The Art of Productivity
    • The Art of the Article
    • Article/Chapter Manuscript Editing
    • How To …
    • Productivity Coaching
    • Free Productivity Webinars
  • Professor Is Out
    • Welcome Video
    • Leaving Academia Support
    • Our Art of Leaving Program
    • Leaving Academia On-Demand Webinars
    • Prof is OUT Client Testimonials
    • It’s OK to Quit
  • Webinars
    • University Workshops & Events
    • Upcoming Live Webinars
    • On-Demand Webinars
  • Blog
  • Merch!

#MakeupMonday: Introducing Sailor-J, the Beauty Blogger U Need When Ur Exposing Sexual Harassment in the Academy

By Karen Kelsky | December 4, 2017

This week I launched the Sexual Harassment in the Academy Crowdsource Survey and 600+ entries into it, I am just a little…ummm…

SHALL WE SAY…

PISSED OFF?

AND IN NO MOOD TO WRITE A MAKEUP MONDAY POST.

CURRENT MOOD, AS REPRESENTED IN LAST NIGHT’S TEXTS:

Professor Friend: I hate people
Did I ever tell you that my boyfriend told me that he found out a few years ago that female students in his department keep a list of “safe” male professors?

Not a list of unsafe or predatory ones — but a list of “safe” ones

Like unsafe is the default

KK: Wow that is terrible

Professor Friend: I know right??
Somehow it was more upsetting than if he had said it was a list of “bad” faculty tho that still would have been upsetting
I asked him if it was a list of profs who didn’t harass women and he said not only that but also profs who wouldn’t as he put it “act bro-ey” and make women uncomfortable in any way.

And that is really the default isn’t it.

KK: Yes
Dicks.
Bag o dicks
Box o dicks

Professor Friend: Yes
Bowl of dicks

KK: Bucket o dicks

Professor Friend: Bidet of dicks

KK: Basket o dicks

Professor Friend: You beat me! I was going to say basket!!!!

Professor Friend:  Bundle of dicks
What’s a term of venery for dicks?

KK: That I don’t know

Professor Friend: A meta-dick? Since toxic masculinity is fractal?

KK: Ur-dick ?

Professor Friend: Yes!
One dick to rule them all, one dick to bind them

KK:  Hahahahahaha!!!!
Ask not what your dick can do for you but what you can do for your dick.
Give me dick or give me death!

Professor Friend:  Hahahahaha
Because I could not stop for dick it kindly stopped for me

KK:  Hahaha!!!!

Professor Friend: Dance like no one is watching, love like it’s never going to hurt and work towards your PhD like academia isn’t a giant shitbowl of dicks

KK:  I wonder if I should put this on the blog. The whole thread.

Professor Friend: I don’t know! It’s kind of cathartic — but will it detract from the gravitas?

KK:  After this fucking survey do I care?

And so for Makeup Monday I leave you in the hands of Sailor J, the beauty blogger we all need today.

As she informs us, “Since it’s simply for the dick, we have to do it.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJaaLXZwmsU&t=44s

And remember: “So long as you look like a newborn baby, men are willing to mate with you.”

(Find more Sailor J here: Twitter: @_xjjsmithx_ Insta: xx_jjsmith_xx )

Filed Under: Makeup, Strategizing Your Success in Academia

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Teresa says

    December 4, 2017 at 2:20 pm

    I am 0% surprised that female students have kept a list (& frankly, have thought of doing the same thing, but for minority-friendly professors). As a doctoral student in behavioral sciences at a predominantly white research-intensive institution in a red Midwestern state who is a het+cis female minority, my friends and I often talk about who is sexist/misogynistic, who has a history of being inappropriate with females, who “gets it” re: diversity + inclusivity or at the very least tries to be an ally, who is racist or thinks they’re not racist but really is (I mean, we’re ALL a little racist – but there are those of us that acknowledge we hold implicit biases and try to dismantle them!), etc. These conversations shape who we study under or with whom we pursue research experience. I don’t see the need for these types of lists going away anytime soon – as long as researchers are senior enough/bring in enough $ or prestige to the university, there is VERY little to no chance of them going away.

    Reply
  2. smnsmm says

    December 4, 2017 at 7:05 pm

    Unfortunately, we’re not as upbeat as you about the academic job market.

    Reply
  3. Cora says

    June 9, 2018 at 4:19 am

    Just tried to look up sailor j on Twitter – but under @_xjjsmithx_ there’s a porn ad account ?!?
    Her new Twitter is @SlaylerJ !

    Reply
    • Karen Kelsky says

      June 12, 2018 at 11:43 am

      Thank you!!

      Reply

Trackbacks

  1. #MakeupMonday: Beyoncé’s Makeup Artist, Sir John | The Professor Is In says:
    June 15, 2020 at 10:45 am

    […] Travel Tips […]

    Reply
  2. #MakeupMonday: The Best Under Eye Product | The Professor Is In says:
    June 15, 2020 at 11:05 am

    […] Travel Tips […]

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Primary Sidebar

Latest From the Blog

  • 52 Career Actions: Week 19: Submit a Piece for Publication
  • 52 Career Actions: Week 18: Prepare a Writing Sample Portfolio

2026 Update Out Now! (It has the gold “Revised & Updated” sticker)

Get Immediate Help

In addition to our blog and book, we have upcoming live webinars, pre-recorded webinars and other programs that you can get started on right away:

The Art of the Academic Cover Letter
The Art of the Article
Unstuck: The Art of Productivity
Quick Reviews
Free Productivity Webinars

Categories

  • #MeTooPhD
  • 52 Career Actions
  • Academic Job Search
    • How To Choose and Manage Recommenders
    • How to Interview
    • How To Write Academic Job Cover Letters
    • How To Write CVs
    • Landing Your Tenure Track Job
    • Major Job Market Mistakes
    • Negotiating Offers
  • Adjunct Issues
  • Advising Advice
  • Alt-University Critique
  • Black Lives Matter
  • COVID19
  • Disability in Academia
  • Dispatches
  • Goodbye Ivory Towers
  • Graduate Student Concerns
    • Bad Advisors and Good Mentors
  • How To Do Conferences
  • How to Get Grants and Fellowships
  • International Perspectives
  • Intersectional Analyses
  • Makeup
  • Marginalized Voices
  • Mental Health and Academia
  • Outliers Books
  • Ph.D. Poverty
  • Podcast
  • Post-Ac Free-Lancing and Small Business
  • Post-Ac Job Search
    • Careers Outside
  • Postdoc Issues
  • Productivity
    • Book Proposals and Contracts
    • Publishing Issues
    • Writing
  • Promote Yourself!
  • Quitting–An Excellent Option
  • Racism in the Academy
  • Rearview Mirror
  • Resumes & Postac Docs
  • Sexual Harassment in the Academy
  • Shame
  • Stop.Acting.Like.A.Grad.Student
  • Strategizing Your Success in Academia
  • Teaching and Research Statements
  • Teaching Demos
  • Teaching Portfolios
  • Tenure–How To Get It
    • How To Build Your Tenure File
    • Surviving Assistant Professorhood
  • The Campus Visit
  • Unstuck
  • Webinars
  • What Not To Wear
  • WIP Hacks
  • Women of Color in Academia
  • Work/Life Balance in Academia
  • Yes, You Can: Women in Academia
  • Your Second and Third Jobs

Footer

About Us

  • Who Is Dr. Karen?
  • Who Is On the TPII Team?
  • In The News
  • Contact Me
  • FAQs
    • Why Trust Me?
  • Testimonials

Community

  • #MeTooPhD
  • Peer Editing
  • PhD Debt Survey
  • Support Fund
  • I Help With Custody Cases for Academics

Copyright © 2026 The Professor Is In·